Death to Mr Jiggles
by The Clow Hatter
Summary: WEE!!! WE'RE FINISHED! See the epic battle of toon vs. someone who has a fetish for toons.
1. Meet Mr Jiggles

Death to Mr. Jiggles  
  
Note: This is a fic based on THE MONSTERS, not the characters from Yu-Gi-Oh. Oh yeah, this is an Anti JigglyPuff fic. So if you're a fan of that singing pokemon...BEWARE OF THE WRATH OF THE DARK MAGICIAN!!! MEE HEE HEE HEE HEEE!!!!  
  
****  
  
The Dark Magician didn't like this at all.  
  
He didn't like living under the same roof with the Dark Magician Girl. Period.  
  
She was more like a whinny little teenage girl who seemed to have the attitute of a screeching Brittney Spears fans. Well, the good thing is that she did managed to save his ass after that "Pandora" incident, so he should be thankful to be living with a female version of the black arts in the same home.  
  
Right?  
  
"Hey Darky!" Dark Magician Girl cried as she held onto some creature, "Darky! Look what I found!"  
  
The Dark Magician cringed at the sound of "Darky", the cute branded nickname the Dark Magician Girl had gaven him since they moved in together. He also hated when she says it along with "look what I found".  
  
It was a warning sign that the Dark Magician knew very well. The girl found some poor adorable defenseless creature in order to warm itself into his heart so he wouldn't feel so morbid and negative on life. Yet the creatures she brings home, always end up being not house-broken.  
  
Last time, she brought in a black red eyes baby dragon. It was cute and the Dark Magician grinned deviously when he saw the baby dragon blew a little fire on Celtic Guardian's ass. Then the mother came...  
  
The Dark Magician went to see what new little monster the Dark Magician Girl brought home this time.  
  
He then laid it eyes on it. The Dark Magician Girl was holding what it looked to be some giant pink puffball with pointy ears, big green eyes, and it had a pink curl at the center of its' forehead.   
  
"Puff," it said.  
  
The Dark Magician then looked toward the Dark Magician Girl.  
  
"Are we suppose to consume that thing?" the Dark Magician asked.  
  
"No silly!" the Dark Magician Girl cried, "This is a JigglyPuff! He followed me all the way home!"  
  
"That's a he?! God, I feel pitifully sorry about his species."  
  
"Well, we're keeping him and he's going to be called Mr. Jiggles! And you'll love having Mr. Jiggles here!"  
  
"We???"  
  
"That's right, Mr. Jiggles is going to stay with us since he has no home."  
  
"JigglyPuff!" the JigglyPuff cried out, "Jiggly! Jiggly!!"  
  
The Dark Magician looked back at the talking pink puffball. There was no way in hell the greatest master of black magic was going let that putrid pink thing stay in here, or even live here!!!!  
  
The Dark Magician Girl look towards the Dark Magician.  
  
"Oh Darky," the Dark Magician Girl said as she placed the JigglyPuff down, "you play nice with Mr. Jiggles now. Make him feel just like he's wanted here, okay?"  
  
"Great..." the Dark Magician muttered. This was not his lucky day.  
  
****  
  
She was on a very important mission. She had used a moter boat to get here, used a machette to make a pathway througout the savage land, and hacked into security cameras to give a free entrance to the multi-millionaire estate...  
  
It was all leading to this. She had final entered the promised land of true die hard comics fantics. Her long awaited and nearly life threatening mission was about to be over...  
  
She slowly walked by, seeing bookshelves filled with endless supply of graphic novels, comic books, mangas, and artbooks as far of the eye could see. When they said Pegasus-sama was a comic fanatic, they weren't kidding!  
  
Then in the center of the room, the object that caused her to loose her neck was right into the center of this hallway of comic books.  
  
Marvel's Fanstastic Four-Issue No. 1, in MINT CONTITION and signed by Stan Lee!! The glass case that held it began to shine as a diamond in a rock. This was a wonderful site to see as tears ran down her eyes as she gazed at the acient beauty that was under the lustrious glass case.  
  
The site to see such a rare and exquistite comic book in front of her very own eyes. Within that book held the entire begining of how four best friends became a group of...  
  
Oh damn.  
  
She couldn't get herself to move ever so closely to this rare comic, to smell the inking of the fine print, or to feel the fine paper caressing her fingers delicate fingers.   
  
That's when a butler like figure appeared right behind her and whacked her behind her back. She collasped onto the ground and fell into unconciousness.  
  
Out of all the things she went through, it was the butler that managed to take her out!  
  
****   
  
The Dark Magician returned to his favourite chair, reading one of his books while his "apprentance" was locked in her room as she went into a trance of listening to shameless gaylike boybands and sang to their horrid grammer sentances.   
  
Thank God the Dark Magician managed to sound proof every single room, so he wouldn't have his hearing be masacued by that retched pop music.  
  
Then Mr. Jiggles came up to him.  
  
"Jigglypuff," it said.  
  
The Dark Magician shifted his head as he glanced at the pink puffball.  
  
"Puff!" it cried.  
  
"Is that all you can say?" the Dark Magician asked.  
  
"Jiggly?" The pink puffball shifted his head as it looked at the Dark Magician  
  
"I'm not amused. If you're here to bother me, then go away."  
  
"Puff! Puff!!"  
  
The pink puffball pulled out a small mircophone speaker. This caught the attention of our Dark Magician. The puffball placed the small microphone near its' mouth and began to sing a song.  
  
The song Mr. Jiggles was singing wasn't too bad. It was quite calming and very relaxing. The Dark Magician felt this was much better than that trashy music the Dark Magician Girl was banging her head to.  
  
Yet, he quietly fell asleep from hearing that soft comforting tune, even though he didn't felt tired at all.   
  
Mr. Jiggles finally stopped his tune. He then puffed his face more than it was before. He saw the Dark Magician fast asleep.  
  
Mr. Jiggles then got very angry. And every single Pokemon fan knew what happens when you piss a JigglyPuff off. He pulled of the cap of his mircophone to reveal it was a black felt marker all along.  
  
Uh oh.  
  
The pink puffball then jumped onto the sleeping dark mage and began his devious work with the felt marker.   
  
****  
  
The next day, Yami Yugi were placed into another battle. Yami was going to finish his latest enemy with his signature finished attack.  
  
"I summon my Dark Magician!!!" Yami Yugi cried out as he placed his card to play.  
  
And soon enough, the Dark Magician appeared onto the game field, ready to wipe out his master's oppenents any day of the weak.   
  
That's if, they all weren't laughing at his face?  
  
The Dark Magician looked around. Why the hell was everyone starting to laugh at him? Yet when he did look at everyone, he heard more laughter...  
  
Even his own master caught a glimspe of his face and tried to cover his mouth in hopes not to offend his favourite card. The Dark Magician clutched onto his emerald staff as he looked at everyone in confusion.  
  
He never was laughed at before. He didn't like that.  
  
"Hey," the oppenent said as he tried to hide his snickering, "maybe your Dark Magician needs to see why everyone is laughing at him."   
  
He threw a mirror shield onto the gamefield and the Dark Magician saw the reason while he looked into that shield.  
  
His bishonen looking face was covered in strange black markings...as if someone decided to doodle on his lovely face and make him look like an idiot.  
  
The Dark Magician gripped onto his staff as he gritted his teeth. His rage began to boil underneath his skin as he looked at himself. There was only one person that could ever do this, make him look like an entire idiot to everyone, to him...and it wasn't that half wit Dark Magician Girl.  
  
It had to be Mr. Jiggles.  
  
The Dark Magician growled to himself. Now he was certain that he didn't need to kick out Mr. Jiggles and after doing this to him!!! It was no more Mr. "Nice Darky" Dark Magician anymore...  
  
Oh no...  
  
Mr. Jiggles needed to die. 


	2. Note From The Author

TO EVERYONE:  
  
THIS IS A ONE SHOT FIC. IT HAS NO CONTINUATION, NOR DOES IT HAVE AN ENDING. I ONLY WROTE THIS FIC WHEN I STONE COLD TIRED AND OUT OF MY MIND. I CANNOT GO INTO THAT STATE ANY LONGER, IT'S LITTERALLY TAKING AFFECT ON MY LIFE, COLLEGE, HEALTH, AND SANITY.   
  
IF YOU WISH FOR IT TO CONTINUE, PLEASE EMAIL YOUR CONCLUSION AND IDEAS AT YINGGIRL@YAHOO.COM.   
  
THANK YOU FOR COOPERATION.   
  
-THE CLOW HATTER  
  
Sorry about typing in caps, but I really had to made my point. I had a dream of chasing that rascally Toon Dark Rabbit in Techocolor since he ruined my romantic date with the Dark Magician!! BAD RABBIT!!! BAD!! BAD!!!   
  
Nargh...  
  
Dunno what the hell does that mean, but it ain't helping me write this ficcy.  
  
Ciao. 


	3. Pink Suger HEART ATTACK!

Death to Mr. Jiggles  
  
Note: This is a fic based on THE MONSTERS, not the characters from Yu-Gi-Oh. Oh yeah, this is an Anti JigglyPuff fic. So if you're a fan of that singing pokemon...BEWARE OF THE WRATH OF THE DARK MAGICIAN!!! MEE HEE HEE HEE HEEE!!!!  
  
Oh yeah, another disgusting pink figure makes her apperance known. I think you know who it will be. Hint: She dresses in pink sailor suit.  
  
****  
  
This meant WAR.  
  
Not the happy dashing and overly glorious warfare when two sides are in combat with each other. No, the warfare the Dark Magician had intended was cold, heartless, and had lots and lots of violence...  
  
To the pink puffball, that is.  
  
Mr. Jiggles dared make him an look like an idiot in a common duel that his master was surely to win. But, his master did win anyways...his opponents died laughing, instead of the casual and impressive mere signature spell that obliberate his enemies in seconds.   
  
Therefore, the Dark Magician had no choice. He has to gain some help so he may acheive his dark goal...  
  
The Death of Mr. Jiggles.  
  
****  
  
Yugi and Joey were walking down the streets, after finishing up a somewhat successful victory against another duelist. Who ever thought that the creatures can actually die from laughter?  
  
Yugi was holding onto his Dark Magician card, wondering why did he appear with all those ridiculious doodling marks on his face?  
  
"Hey..." Joey commented, "at least you won and we all had a good laugh from it."  
  
"I guess so," Yugi replied, "but Yami told me that the last time someone actually did laugh at the Dark Magician, that opponent's city was destroyed the next day...devistating a small portion of civilization off the face of the earth."  
  
"Wow, guess Darky can't take a joke, eh?"  
  
"Uh...you better not call him that."  
  
"Come on Yug, your cards gotta lighten up for once, especially Darky."   
  
The card then began to glow a dark violet shade, emitting a dark energy from the card itself. Yugi started to sweatdrop as he held onto the card and faced Joey.  
  
"Joey," Yugi started, "I think you're asking for a death wish..."  
  
"Yeah right," Joey chuckled, "what's Darky going to do? Come out from his card form and attack me, hmm?"   
  
"That doesn't sound like a bad idea," the card replied.  
  
****  
  
After hearing that soft dark, yet calming voice...the two boys started freaking out. Of course, both of them had experiance cards coming to life every once in a while.  
  
But that was from Bakura's Millieum Ring that caused the creatures to come to life...and no ring nor owner were near the two boys at this very moment.  
  
The card then floated away from Yugi's small hands as it began to take on form on the dark mysterious figure...without the doodling marks that plagued his beautiful face for a while. The two boys were more startled than amazed to see one of the cards coming to life and was stan...er floating right in front of them.   
  
The Dark Magician held onto his emerald green staff as he looked at the two boys. Joey was the first one to crack up. He feel onto his knees to gravel and praise the powerful dark mage that appeared before him.  
  
"I'm so sorrie Mr. Dark Magician!!!" Joey cried out, "I'll swear I'll never poke fun at you or force you to listen to my dumb comments!! Just please!! SPARE ME MY LIFE!!"  
  
"Idiot," the Dark Magician replied, "don't you know you're protected from me since you befriended my Master?"  
  
"Then why did you just say..." A sly grin was on the Dark Magician's face.  
  
"I was just...'lightening up'."  
  
"Dark Magician," Yugi asked as he looked up at his favourite card, "what brings you here in the first place?"  
  
The magician looked down at the young boy, who seemed to have the same features...except he was a tad shorter and looked more innocent. So this was the "aibou" Yami was talking about...  
  
"It's that damned Mr. Jiggles," Dark Magician growled lowly to himself, "oh, the Dark Magician Girl couldn't just leave that damned pink puffball where she found him! Oh no, she had to bring that accused creature right on over to make my life being a mere Duel Monster Card as an living Hell!! And those hidious markings is that damned Mr. Jiggles' fault!!"   
  
"I never knew the Dark Magician had chick problems," Joey said.  
  
"Uh..." Yugi replied, "the Dark Magician Girl is not only the Dark Magician's apprentance, but she's also his little sister."  
  
Joey then went cold. After reading those amusing eechi fanfics and gazing over the tantlizing artwork that dealt with the Dark Magician Girl and the Dark Magician...  
  
It then felt so wrong. He also had a sister, but he never had feelings for her IN THAT WAY!!! Or that highly affectionate, passionate...  
  
"Dude," Joey said as he looked at the Dark Magician once more, "you have some serious problems."  
  
Just before the three of them could continue their conversation of pink puffballs and dirty erotic fics that dealt with "black magic", a pint size sailor senshi appeared and comfronted the two boys and their Dark Magician.   
  
"Hold it right there!!" it cried out.  
  
****  
  
The group turned around to face this sailor scout. She had big red eyes, a sailor fuku in pink, and her hair was in fluffy pink pigtails, which almost resembled as a pink bunny. She looked around the same height The sight of this pink ensored sailor senshi tended to get on the black magician's nerves, especially her whinny "cute" voice.   
  
"Aren't you from a different..." Yugi asked as he looked at the girl, "anime series??"  
  
"I am the pretty suited soldier from the future," she cried as she posed, "Sailor Chibi Moon!!! In the name of the future moon, I'll punish you!!!"   
  
"Hey, why the hell should I be punished for?!!" the Dark Magician snapped at the pint size scout, "I came her to get some fricken damn aid, not get some pint size bitch raving to fight for love and justic right in front of me!!!"  
  
"Hey!!!" Joey cried, "This is a PG-13 fic!!! We can't just swear like that!"  
  
Sailor Chibi Moon then unleashed her heart-shape rod and raised it to the skies.   
  
"Pink Sugar..." Sailor Chibi Moon cried out, "HEART ATTACK!!"  
  
The color of Yugi's and Joey's faces started to face away, turning to an instant pale white. Sailor Chibi Moon did something she should never do at all. Her heart-shaped rod unleashed a row of pink hearts. They were cute to see at first, until the pink hearts were heading towards...the Dark Magician!!  
  
Uh oh.  
  
The Dark Magician could not fight back with his own magical attacks since he was constantly being smacked in the face with these annoying pink hearts!!!   
  
Pink Hearts...  
  
Pink Puffball...  
  
Pink...  
  
They all had one thing in common; Mr. Jiggles.  
  
Something in the Dark Magician had finally cracked.  
  
Yugi and Joey slowly backed away from their fellow Dark Magician. Sailor Chibi Moon held her rod and realized something she should have realized in the first place.  
  
"Hey!" Sailor Chibi Moon cried out, "You're supposed to kneel down before me before the other senshi arr..."  
  
She then looked around. Not a single sailor senshi was there to back up the pink senshi in trainning, nor were the cats. She weakly turned to face the Dark Magician, who was seriously pissed off with this pink sailor runt.   
  
"HEAD FOR COVER!!!" was Yami's voice in the puzzle who quickly instructed his aibou and Joey. The two boys then ran into the nearest ally and hid behind a garbage bin.  
  
The Dark Magician then unleashed his attack. Not only did he vanquish that pesky Sailor Chibi Moon with ease, but he his managed to do a lot of critical windows damage on the whole block. Car alarms began barking constantly.  
  
****  
  
The Dark Magician was pleased with this effort. That was one less pink figure that he had to worry ab...  
  
"Puff," a familiar voice said.  
  
A nerve began to twitch. The Dark Magician saw who it was that said that annoying vile "puff" sound. Right in front of him was....  
  
"You..." the Dark Magician growled.  
  
Mr. Jiggles.  
  
"Jiggly!" Mr. Jiggles cried out, "JigglyPuff! JigglyPuff!!"  
  
"Were you the one that sent that crazed sailor bitch over here?!!!" the Dark Magician hissed.  
  
"Puff." Mr. Jiggles nodded his body as to say "yes".   
  
"You know, this means I have to kill you now."  
  
Then Mr. Jiggles leaped towards the Dark Magician and gave a kind warming smootch. After that, the Dark Magician started coughing and hacking the taste of Pokemon chow that was in his mouth. Damnit! He'll smell like that fricken puffball for weeks!!! This was a pretty good way of get the chicks turned off.  
  
That was bad. The Harpies were going be doing their "special act" this Friday night at the Shadow's den. And if he doesn't get some ass this Friday night....  
  
Mr. Jiggles better start finding a mortician.  
  
Mr. Jiggles then flew away, puffing everywhere he went. He was surely the gayest site anyone in Domino City could ever see. Yami, who had taken over Yugi's body, and Joey knew it was safe for them to come out since Mr. Jiggles had fleed the area.   
  
"Whoa," Joey said as he looked around the area, "I known Pokemon was evil, but NOT THIS DIOBOCTICALLY EVIL!!"  
  
"So that's Mr. Jiggles," Yami replied as he looked towards the Dark Magician, "are you all right?"  
  
"I'm fine..." Dark Magician muttered, "but Mr. Jiggles won't when I get a hold onto him."  
  
A Blue Eyes Toon Dragon then flew towards the group, carrying a sign. But wait on a sec, didn't Yami already defeated Pegasus?! And where the hell did this Toon come from?!!   
  
The Blue Eyes Toon Dragon then landed in front of Yami, lifting the sign over his head for Yami to read as he waved his tail happily, knowing he'll be greatly rewarded by the author for his services.  
  
"Well," Joey asked as he looked at Yami, "what does it say? Another invite to the Duelist Kingdom?"   
  
"End of Part 2," Yami read as he looked towards the sign, "Please Read and Review. Thank you kindly for your patiance."  
  
"What the heck does that mean?"  
  
"I think this fic will have a continuation afterall."  
  
"Is that a good thing?" 


	4. Why We Shouldn't Give Darky Booze and Me...

Death to Mr. Jiggles  
  
Note: This is a fic based on THE MONSTERS, not the characters from Yu-Gi-Oh. Oh yeah, this is an Anti JigglyPuff fic. So if you're a fan of that singing pokemon...BEWARE OF THE WRATH OF THE DARK MAGICIAN!!! MEE HEE HEE HEE HEEE!!!!  
  
This part of a fic is dedicated to a TOON THAT GAVE ME THREE HOURS OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT!!!  
  
So without further ado, please enjoy the tale of...Chi Chi, the beloved Blue Eyes Toon Dragon who loves buritos, especially the Strawberry Delight Breakfast Burito. Puff!  
  
****  
  
She woke up, regaining conciousness from being stuck by the damn butler. She then realized she was tied to a chair. She looked around and noticed her capturers...  
  
Oh yeah, and a slightly annoyed Pegasus.  
  
"This is the fifth time you attempted to steal that comic," Pegasus began as he looked towards the girl, "and yet you failed to even have it in your grasp. Even after defiling the security cams with God knows what, re-coding the system twice, turning my guards into seeker of Baywatch chicks, and causing the alarms to let loose on everyone in this manor!!!"  
  
"Whooo," she said, "I did good causing your insurance company to get into a panic freezy. Wheee!!"  
  
"Is there any reason why you're after the comic in the first place?"   
  
"I have no reason. I just was bored."  
  
"Well, boredom isn't enough to cover up over thousands of dollers worth in damage, you little ragweed!!"  
  
"Oh. You better not threaten me, Chi Chi won't like that."  
  
One of the guards looked at the tied up girl.  
  
"And what or who is 'Chi Chi'?" he asked.  
  
"Chi Chi will be here any minute now," she said as she looked at everyone.  
  
Silence.  
  
The tied up girl turned looked around.  
  
"I said..." the girl began, "Chi Chi should be here any minute now!!!"  
  
No reply and everyone had sweatdrops.  
  
"CHI CHI!!!" she wailed as she struggled from her ropes, "Help!!! Pegasus is trying to kill me!!!! You gotta help me or else you'll never get your buritos!!!"  
  
"Am not!!" Pegasus replied.  
  
Then a burst of wind flung into the room, sending some of the guards on their knees. A dragon then entered the room, a legendary Blue Eyes White Dragon to be exact. He unleashed his "Burst Stream" attack, causing other guards to run in horror and leaving more damage in Pegasus' manor by creating a really big hole in the wall.  
  
But...   
  
As the dragon landed onto the ground, he swung his right claws at the ropes that held his loving master. She ran and wrapped her arms around the dragon. The dragon was around three feet tall and he gave a loud purring sound as he was reunited with his Master once again.  
  
"Chi Chi," she said as she gave a burito to her fellow pet, "thanks for saving my butt."  
  
The dragon munched gradually on the delightly meaty and bean substance that was wrapped in a warm tortella. Everyone else was freaking out on who Chi Chi was, except for Pegasus, who created the "toon" based deck, and the chick. Chi Chi wasn't the legendary Blue Eyes White Dragon.  
  
Chi Chi was...a Blue Eyes TOON Dragon.  
  
****   
  
After hanging around with the Master in the Light realm, the Dark Magician was trying to swallow up his disgusting "encounter" with Mr. Jiggles by doing something ever guy will normally do to get rid of his problems.  
  
Getting himself really pissed drunk.  
  
"And I said to that Seto kid..." the Dark Magician began as he gulped down another shooter, "bring out yer damn trio of Blue Eyes, I'll make all of yer my unyielding bitches!!!!"   
  
"Geez," the Summon Skull said as he looked towards the Dark Mage, "maybe you had a little too much to drink..."  
  
"Shaddup Bonesy!! I been thought the Black Plague being this drunk, and goddamnit! I SURVIVE IT!!! I AM GOD'S AND SATAN'S BITCH AT THE SAME TIME!!!!!!"  
  
"Dark, I'm serious. You drank the entire Scotch supply, from five bars now. And watch with the langugue, this is 'supposed' to be a PG-13 fic."  
  
"The Scotch?!" The Feral Imp cried out, "NO!!!! Damn you, Darky!!!"  
  
The Dark Magician then raised his glass woozly. The effects of the booze were getting to him...big time. Yet he didn't care.  
  
"Shad up..." the Dark Magician slurred, "and pour me *hic* another drinky."  
  
"You know," the Summon Skull began, "you seem to start having a drinking problem."  
  
"I don't have *hic* booze problem. I have the Mr. Jiggles who I must kill problem. Now pou..." Before he could continue the sentance, our beloved mage fell from his chair and collasped onto the floor.   
  
The Summon Skull sighed at the fallen black mage. Things still haven't changed, even after 5000 years!!!  
  
"Damn that mage!" the Summon Skull muttered, "he always does this when he gets drunk!!! Now one of us has to bring him home to sober up!! Sometimes, I wonder how on Earth did he get to become Master's favourite card in the first place!"   
  
Someone else then wrapped his arms around the mage and picked him up, cradling the acholic fused mage in his arms. He smiled slightly while holding "Darky", who started to fall asleep.  
  
The violet haired mage was alaming cute when he was asleep, then again the Dark Magician was always attractive.   
  
"I'll take him home," he said as he turned to face Summon Skull, "I think he wouldn't mind."  
  
"Thanks Celtic," Summon Skull replied, "you're a real help."  
  
The elfen guardian smiled as he held onto his loving sweet prize. He was going to show how much he was attractive to the mysertious dark mage, even if the mage refused his affection. He was going to make Yami's favourite card his once and for all. He then calmly left the bar with the sleeping mage in his arms.  
  
The Feral Imp was watching all of it, then he turned to face Summon Skull.  
  
"I bet 5 bucks that the Celtic gets in bed with Darky," the Feral Imp muttered, "and both of them go all the way."   
  
****  
  
Chi Chi, after finishing up his treat, then flew in front of Pegasus and pulled out a deck of duel monster cards, flapping his wings vigeriously as he swayed his tail back and forth. Pegasus then looked towards the owner of Chi Chi.  
  
"What is your pet want?" Pegasus asked.  
  
"Oh," she replied, "Chi Chi wants to challange you to a duel. He wants to see if you are the Toon Deck Master."  
  
Chi Chi grinned as he nodded his head.  
  
"You want me to duel against one of my own Toon creations on my own grounds?" Pegasus replied as he looked towards the cartoonish Blue Eyes, "Do you know how ridious it is? And what will I get if I do partake in this duel?"  
  
Chi Chi flew out of the room for a few minutes. The renagade Toon dragon then returned with a tied up Seto Kaiba and Yami Bakura, who were both awfully pissed at the moment.  
  
"WHERE THE HELL AM I?!!!" Yami Baruka yelled out as he tried to stuggle from the ropes.  
  
"You traditor," Seto growled as he glared icy at the Blue Eyes Toon Dragon, which was one of *his* Blue Eyes White Dragon.  
  
"I think Chi Chi will give you Seto and Yami Bakura if you win the duel," she said, "maybe have them for your personal slaves."   
  
The Blue Eyes Toon Dragon raised a sign, which was written "CORRECT!" on it.  
  
"WHAT?!!!" the two tied up guys screamed in horror.  
  
"Perfect!" Pegasus cried out, "I always wanted to have our dear Kaiba-boy as a tasteful man servant."   
  
"That's it!!!" Seto hissed as he began to struggle from his ropes, "Once I get my hands on this author of this fic...SHE'S DEAD!!! DEAD!!!!! DEAD!!!!"  
  
"Oh Remo! Croquet! Do us a favour and set up the Dueling Table for us."   
  
"Yes sir!" two men cried as they ran out the room.  
  
Chi Chi began flying around in circles as he held onto his deck. He had worked on his very own deck and thanks to Paul's advice, he was going to do his own first duel ever...and this was with his creator!   
  
If he won, at least he'll manage to free the other Toons too. It was all paybay for Seto being so mean to him when he was under his control. So Chi Chi was really happy that "Kaiba-boy" was going to suffer badly if Chi Chi lost.   
  
Which he wasn't, because everyone loves Chi Chi.  
  
****  
  
-SHAMELESS PROMOTION AD-  
  
Barney: Hiya Boys and Girls! Let's sing a song. "I love you, you love me..."  
Telebubbies: Meheeheheeeheeheee...  
Elmo: Elmo knows where you live.  
  
Hey kids! Wanna learn the good morals of our society, like caring, sharing, and being nice to one another...but not from the gay ass dinosaur, freaky television on their stomach creatures, or from some dead guy's muppets?  
  
Or are you a really big fan of Yu-gi-oh that wants to push this intriging card game/anime series to its' limits?   
  
If you said "YES" to either of these questions, then you need CHI CHI! The lovable Blue Eyes Toon Dragon that loves Buritos, especially the Strawberry Delight Breakfast Burito of extreme yummyness!!   
  
Meet Chi Chi, a fellow Toon creature with a Heart of the Cards. Watch him as he runs away from the "evil" Seto Kaiba who wants to de-toon him so Chi Chi can become a regular Blue Eyes White Dragon and Kaiba shall have the Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon that'll be strong enough to take over the world! Oh no, Chi Chi!  
  
Seto Kabia: *holding a net* COME BACK HERE, YA TOON BLUE EYES!!!!   
  
Unlike those other guys, Chi Chi will show you the meaning of these morals, but he's not alone...  
  
He brought along his Toon Friends too!   
  
Dark Rabbit: Gya ha ha ha..  
Toon Magician Girl: Wow! I'm actually on TV! Hiya Darky-sama!!  
Toon Dark Robot: *mechanical whizzes and chirps*  
Parrot Dragon: Wwwrrraaaccckk!!!!   
Kirby: Hi!!!  
  
Yes Chi Chi, the lovable Blue Eyes Toon Dragon. If you can't handle the extreme super deformed kawaiiness of a Toon Blue Eyes White Dragon, then there must be something wrong with ya.  
  
**shows Kaiba chasing after Chi Chi, him carrying a rocket launcher and screaming obsenities as he misses Chi Chi with ever single shot he throws at the dang toon**   
  
****  
  
Next Chappie: The Dueling of the Toons: Chi Chi vs. Pegasus!, A Yaoi Scene, And How To Kill JigglyPuff. But it'll only work if you review.   
  
-The Clow Hatter 


	5. How Mr Jiggles DID DIE

Death to Mr. Jiggles  
  
Note: This is a fic based on THE MONSTERS, not the characters from Yu-Gi-Oh. Oh yeah, this is an Anti JigglyPuff fic. So if you're a fan of that singing pokemon...BEWARE OF THE WRATH OF THE DARK MAGICIAN!!! MEE HEE HEE HEE HEEE!!!!  
  
Actually, this was a fic based on someone writting the fic in the Smash Bros. where was it was all the Smashers trying to get rid of the pink puffball from Hell. Email me if you know who that author was.  
  
And to answer some reviews:  
  
-No. Chi Chi is going to be one fighting Pegasus, NOT KABIA-BOY!! He's tied up with Yami Bakura at the moment. ^^;; Oh yeah, Pegasus has the eye...so this is going to be a really funny battle kids.  
-The Dark Magician and the Celtic Guardian is owed by Yugi.  
-Of course Kaiba is mean...he really hates Toons, a lot.  
-No. You can't have Chi Chi. If you only slept for 3 hours and wake up afterwards having a dream of a Blue Eyes Toon Dragon who craves Strawberry Breakfast Buritos, then we'll take about the ownership of Chi Chi.  
-Okay, who's the bloody (CENSORED!!!) that said Sailor Moon "sucks" and the creator should be destroyed?!!! I've got Galixia, Jupiter, Saturn, Pluto, and Mars right here who would like to speak to you...NOW.  
**shows ther four pretty suited senshi figures powering up their Super attacks and looking evily pissed off**  
  
****  
  
The Dark Rabbit was reading a documentation before the latest duel was about to begin.   
  
"As hearby reading the agreement to this duel," the black bunny began, "the claim victor shall win the following. If Pegasus is the victor, he shall have the legal right to owe Seto Kaiba and Yami Bakura as his personal servants for the rest of their lives. If Chi Chi is the victor, there shall be a grand beach bash in the Duelist Kingdom for us loyal Toons and our friends, the Smashers...at Kaiba-boy's expense."   
  
"You know," Yami Bakura muttered, "I think I'm starting to hate Toons now."  
  
"Shut up," Seto growled as he tried to struggle from the ropes, "just shut up."   
  
The Dark Rabbit looked around as he was holding onto the legal documentation that Chi Chi and Pegasus agreed to sign upon before partaking in this ridiculious duel.  
  
"Wow," the Dark Rabbit said, "either way this duel goes, Kaiba-boy gets screwed in the end anyways. Since I see no one rejecting this legal agreement. It's time to....DDDDDUUUUUUEEEEEELLLLL, kids!!!!!!"  
  
The Dark Rabbit then scamper away, returning to card form and back to Pegasus' deck of cards. The two players had taken their position on the dueling grounds. Chi Chi needed a little help to get on it since everytime he managed to get on, he would fall back down.   
  
That problem was instantly solved with a dragon booster seat. Seto then took a glimpe at the demented Blue Eyes Toon Dragon.  
  
"I'll kill you if you loose," Seto said, "and I'll even kill you if you win."  
  
Chi Chi replied to Seto by blowing a raspberry at his old master's face.   
  
****  
  
Dark was coming back to his senses once again. The scotch was dying out and he was back to his sober self once more. As he groogly started to wake up, he noticed that one of his wrists was handcuffed to the bedpost.  
  
Oh yeah, he then relized that THIS WAS NOT HIS OWN BED. He also noticed his lovely violet armour and clothing were parted away from him...  
  
Leaving a nude violet haired black mage handcuffed to the bed.  
  
Sweatdrops began to run down his face as he began to struggle violently, trying to escape this bed. If he had his staff with him, he can easily break free from this bed, but even that was parted away from him!!!  
  
Damnit! What if the Amazons got him and decided they needed to "mate" with him? It happened once! Or what if he was finally cornered and maned by some rabid fangirl??  
  
This caused "Darky" to struggle harder to break that stupid handcuff. Fangirls were very dangerous demonic female creatures. Everyone in the Shadow Realm were afraid of them, even the Toons too.  
  
Then the door swung open, causing the panicking mage to calm down. He gave himself a sigh of relief since he knew who that person was. It was the Celtic Guardian at the doorway, who was holding some various items that the Dark Magician did not notice...  
  
Yet.  
  
"Celtic!" the Dark Magician cried out, "By Ra! You've come! Some demented fangirl trapped me in this mess! I bet she was hired by that damn Mr. Jiggles!!! Please get me out of here right away!"  
  
"Yeah..." the Celtic Guardian replied as he approached the nude mage, "I'm here to save you. It's going to be okay."  
  
"Thanks. The sooner I'm out of here, the sooner I can obliberate that damn puffball!!! I knew that little thing was viciously evil and..."  
  
The magician then reliezed that the blonde hair elven warrior had other plans in mind, like making that damn handcuff tighter. What the Ra?!!! He also saw what the Celtic Guardian was really carrying...  
  
Scented oils, lubricants, delightful sex toys, and flavoured condoms that the elf guardian placed upon the night table that was next to the bed. Oh Ra...  
  
The Dark Magician then looked at the Celtic Guardian, who was looking upon the violet beauty with his soft amber eyes.  
  
"Celtic..." the Dark Magician asked, "what is the meaning of all of this?"   
  
The Celtic Guardian started to flustered a shade of red as he lowered himself to face the violet haired mage face to face. His hands had felt the soft skin on the violet hair mage. Oh Ra, how much the elven warrior wanted this lovely nude beauty to his own once and for all!!!   
  
"I always wanted you Dark-y," Celtic replied, "ever since you were on the battlefield. I always had dreamed to see you again. And now, I'm going to make you mine. I'm not under Malik's or Mr. Jiggles' control. I just want you...badly."   
  
Before the magician could reply, the Celtic Guardian grabbed onto the magician, pressing his lips onto his violet dark beauty's lips...claiming his new found lover.   
  
****  
  
Mr. Jiggles was having fun.  
  
Since Darky wasn't around to toture, Mr. Jiggles developed a new hobby...  
  
Mr. Jiggles was doodling on all those boyband posters that covered the wall. He hated singers a lot. He wanted to become the greatest singer ever...so he had fun demolishing all of Dark Magician Girl's memorbilia.   
  
Then she entered the room.   
  
"Hey Mr. Jiggles," the Dark Magician Girl cried, "I got a new black..."  
  
Her cute innocent childlike smile faded away. She saw her entire room, the shrine devoted to boy bands were all covered by the dark   
  
"Puff!" Mr. Jiggles cried.   
  
She looked at the puffball with beady green eyes. She dropped her bags and gripped onto her rod. A felt marker was all over their faces. She even saw her limited edition Justin doll onto the floor, maned to bits.  
  
Justin...  
  
She had dreams of marrying that guy now that silicon whore was no more plaguing his innocent. Now, that could never happen.   
  
She then pointed her rod at Mr. Jiggles, glaring at him with her dark emerald eyes. This is probably why she was considered to be the sister of one of the most powerful spellcaster in the Shadow Realm.   
  
"YOU HURT MY JUSTIN!!!!" the Dark Magician Girl screamed as she unleashed her signature "Burning Black Magic" attack at the Puffball from Hell. It wasn't as strong as Oni-chan's attacks, but thinking of her beloved "Justin" now dead caused her to boost her attack from 2000 to a whooping 6000.  
  
"JIGGLYPUFF!!!" Mr. Jigglies cried out as he was alienated from the Shadow Realm forever.   
  
No more did that pink puffball dare show up his face to torment the users of the black arts with his hynotic singing voice ever again.   
  
And that's how Mr. Jiggles was no more.  
  
****  
  
Next Chappie: Chi Chi vs. Pegasus. Can someone email me to give me info on Pegasus deck? Or how the Hell am gonna write a duel against Toon vs. Maker? Ideas anyone?  
  
-The Clow Hatter 


	6. I Wish My Duels Ended Like This

Death to Mr. Jiggles  
  
Note: This is a fic based on THE MONSTERS, not the characters from Yu-Gi-Oh. Oh yeah, this is an Anti JigglyPuff fic. So if you're a fan of that singing pokemon...BEWARE OF THE WRATH OF THE DARK MAGICIAN!!! MEE HEE HEE HEE HEEE!!!! The Smashers are owed by Nintendo.  
  
Ladies and Gentleman, it's the battle all Toons and fellow duelists were waiting for...probably the greatest fight of the year.  
  
Chi Chi vs. Pegasus. Enjoy.  
  
****  
  
This was it.  
  
Everything was at stake. The battle between Creater and...er...Three Foot Tall Toon Dragon was about to unfold.   
  
"We're counting on you Chi Chi!" the Dark Rabbit cried as he was dressed up in Joey's get-up.  
  
"You can do it, Chi Chi!" one of the Toon Gemini Elves dressed up as Tea, "Believe in the power of friendship!"  
  
"And then we'll party all night long and get fully drunk on Pegasus' front lawn!" The Toon Archery Girl cried as she was dressed up as Mai. (How the hell did she get out of her oyster shell? O.o???)   
  
"Someone please kill me," Seto muttered as he looked at the toons. Sure, he could handle one of his legendary Blue Eyes White Dragon that became a Toon and wants to stay Toon, who is now dueling Pegasus...  
  
But he couldn't handle the rest of the Toons cosplaying and acting like Yugi and his travelling gang of idiots!!!   
  
Yami Bakura glared at the Toon creature that was impersonating his lighter half.   
  
"At least you could have been more whimper!!!" Yami Bakura cried.  
  
"But I like Ryo..." the other Toon Gemini Elf replied as she was dressed up as the white hair yami's lighter half, "and plus I get dibs on the eye if Chi Chi wins."  
  
"THE EYE BELONGS TO ME, YOU PINT SIZE BITC...."  
  
WHAM!!!   
  
The criminally insane white hair Yami was silenced by the Manga Ryu Ran and his pretty large mallet of mass destruction.   
  
"You're a meanie," Manga Ryu Ran replied as the relentless tomb robber slumped onto the cold hard floor with a thud and only to reveal a large bump on his head.  
  
"This is Hell," Seto said to himself.   
  
****  
  
So after having shown their affection with each other, the two dueling monsters began their "fun". I'm not going to tell you what type of "fun" it is since this is a PG-13 rated fic and I tend to keep it like that.   
  
So I'll just say that Celtic was "riding" the Dark Magician real good.  
  
Then, as the two monsters were about to reach their climatic orgasm state of intense pleasure...the door swung open.  
  
"Dark Magician," Yami said, "I was cal..."  
  
Yami froze as he saw his favourite creatures doing "it". The two creatures turn their heads to face their beloved Master.   
  
"WHAT IN RA'S NAME ARE YOU TWO DOING?!!" Yami cried out, "DON'T YOU KNOW WE HAVE CHILDREN READING THIS FIC?!!"  
  
"Oh shoot..." Celtic replied.  
  
"Yami..." Yugi muttered in the puzzle, "what's going on? Why are you yelling? Can I see?"  
  
The puzzle then reverted back to Yugi once more who gazed at what was going on right now.  
  
The young tri-color hair boy ran away screaming for his life while the two monsters were still watching. Then his Yami went after him, trying to calm down his tramatized aibou.  
  
"I don't think we'll be in the duels for a while," Dark commented.   
  
****  
  
And so the duel began.  
  
Chi Chi started off by placing one of his creature onto the field into defense mood and he place a card face down as Pegasus did also the same with his creatures and smirk. Chi Chi was then whimpering as he look at his new master. The blue eyes toon dragon was on a chain leash.   
  
"Chi Chi," she said, "this is only to protect you from when Pegasus draws out Toon World. This leash is to restrain you from not getting yourself caught in a Dragon Capture Jar."  
  
Chi Chi gave a large whimpering cry as he gave his master the sad puppy dog look.   
  
"No Chi Chi!!!" she cried, "I'm not going to loosen this leash up! You think I'm that stupid?!"  
  
"Just give the poor thing what he wants," Pegeasus chuckled as he placed his most famous magic card onto the field.  
  
Toon World.  
  
The mystical "Toon World" revealed itself once more onto the playing field, causing Chi Chi and the Toons to look at it with such amazement and gaze the the cty that came out of the pages of the book. Chi Chi wapped his tail furiously as he gazed at the city.  
  
This means he can now come into play now.  
  
"IT'S JUST A BIG STUPID POP UP BOOK, YA MORONS!!!" Seto yelled out.  
  
WHAM!!!  
  
Seto then suffered the same fate as Yami Bakura. No one shall ever mess with a Toon who carries a very large mallet of mass destruction.  
  
The Dark Rabbit, who was dressed as Joey, looked at Manga Ryu Ran.  
  
"Why did you do that for?" the Dark Rabbit asked, "We could have shoved him in a sick derange yaoi story of him screwing bunnies and take over in such a way that like in Mission Impossible."  
  
"He insulted our home," the egg-shell wearing dragon replied, "I don't like him. He's just as mean as Yami Bakura was."  
  
One of the Toon Gemini Elves looked towards the knocked out boys.   
  
"I hope they wake up," The Toon Gemini Elf who was dressed up as Ryou said, "I think I'm starting to like them...getting hurt, that is."  
  
****  
  
Chi Chi was gazing at the magical card. He knew he had a way to get rid of this card...  
  
But he didn't use it.  
  
"Chi Chi!!" his new owner cried, "Don't fall for it!!!"  
  
Chi Chi tried to focus himself on the game he was dueling. Then Pegasus pulled out another creature and placed in attack mood.  
  
"Oh Chi Chi..." the creature chanted.   
  
The three foot tall dragon looked ahead and started to loose control. It was the Toon Dark Elf.  
  
Okay, screw the rules!!!   
  
Chi Chi saw that hot babe on Pegasus' grounds and he wanted her. His cards that were in his clawlike hands were flown all over the place as he jumped onto the field and headed towards the love of his life...  
  
Yet Chi Chi still couldn't reach her. He then found out why.   
  
His owner still had him on the chained leash, trying to pull the midguided Toon back to his seat.  
  
"Chi Chi!" she cried out, "Stop this!! It's a trap!! He's luring you into the battlefield, you got to..."  
  
Too late.   
  
Chi Chi turned his tail into sissors that could cut steel chains and broke free from his leash. He dashed towards the lovely attractive Dark Elf as he carried roses in one claw and chocolates in the other.  
  
Pegasus smirked as he reveal the trap card, the Dragon Capture Jar.  
  
"CHI CHI!!!" she yelled out.  
  
The three foot tall toon dragon realized his master was right and was far too late to retreat. The Toon Dark Elf sidestepped as the blinded by love dragon passed by her and was going to be sealed up by that cursed jar. She chuckled in glee as Chi Chi was going be stuck in defense mode for the rest of his life.  
  
Or was he?  
  
****  
  
As long as Pegasus played this game, this is the first time ever he noticed this happening!!  
  
The Dragon Capture Jar did managed to capture the three foot tall white dragon but not entirely as it expected to do...  
  
Half of Chi Chi was in the jar while the rest of the dragon was waving his hind legs and tail uncontrorablely. Apparently, due to Chi Chi addiction to those warmy delicious burritos, Chi Chi gained enough weight to cause him to get stuck in the round rim of the Dragon Capture Jar so he can not be fully encased in the jar.  
  
"Impossible!" Pegasus cried out as he saw the jar, "That jar should had capture the whole dragon!!"  
  
"Never underestimate the power of eating burritos," the owner said.  
  
Chi Chi grunted and groan as he tried to pull that stupid jar off the upper part of his body while Pegasus just watched. So did the Toon Dark Elf.  
  
"All right Chi Chi!!" the Dark Rabbit cried out, "You're da Toon!!"  
  
"Chi Chi..." the owner muttered as she clasped her hands. She was glad the dragon she found was still all right.  
  
But how can the three foot tall Toon dragon still play now? Half of him was still stuck in that vicious jar while the other half was waving uncontrolabally.  
  
No problem. Just whip out the Dragon Piper.   
  
The bizarre jarlike creature began to play his nicely decorated flute. It managed to calm down the dragon who was stuck in the Dragon Capture Jar.   
  
But it did not free him. Chi Chi's whines were starting to sound really really pathetic as half of him was still incased in that jar.  
  
Okay...time for Plan B.  
  
The Dragon Piper pulled a crowbar and nudge it between Chi Chi and the jar. He then used the crowbar as a lever to free the whinning dragon.  
  
After doing that to free the captive dragon, Chi Chi went flying out from the jar...   
  
And smacked right into the wall that was across the room!!!!  
  
"CHI CHI!!!" his owner cried out as she saw the dragon sliding down the wall.  
  
The white dragon had taken enough damage and done lot more around the mansion. Every Toon that was watching cringed as Chi Chi started to get up from the damage he created ad he started crying. The roses and chocolates he was gonna give to the elf were in ruins!  
  
Pegasus then turned to face the owner of the wailing Blue Eyes.  
  
"Is your creature admiting defeat?" Pegasus asked.  
  
"No..." his owner replied, "Chi Chi just feels heart broken just now. Poor guy. If Seto hadn't been a bastard to him, he would be a better play..."  
  
Then Chi Chi mad a mad dash towards that hot elf chick once more as he sprayed himself with scented colongue and stuff. Of course any loving lady will adore a simple kiss from such a great and legendary creature.  
  
He flew towards the elven maiden with his eyes closed as he was about to press his slightly scaley lips on a warm soft elf.  
  
The Toon Dark Elf quickly dodged the love sick dragon causing Chi Chi to smack his lips upon someone else.  
  
That someone else was Pegasus.  
  
Both of them were knock down.   
  
****  
  
The Toons' faces had their mouths handing and their eyes wide open, speechless of what happened right now. They weren't the only ones...  
  
Pegasus' guards almost dropped their guns that they were carrying, shocked of what that Blue Eyes Toon Dragon can do.  
  
It took a few minutes until someone managed to talk.  
  
"So who won?" The Toon Archery Girl asked.  
  
"Well Pegasus didn't win..." one of the Toon Gemini Elves cried.  
  
"Yet nor did Chi Chi..." the other Toon Gemini Elf replied.  
  
"So...that means..."  
  
The Dark Rabbit began throwing confetti into the air and balloons appeared behind the black bunny.   
  
"We get our beach bash and torture Kabia-boy at the same time!" the Dark Rabbit cried.   
  
"YAY!!!" was the euthusic replies from the Toons.  
  
****  
  
And so forth on the following days ahead, the Toons created more damage that anyone could possible imagine that could be done in the Duelist Kingdom. Everyone was invited, Duel Monster, Dueliest, and Smasher...  
  
After a while, the Celtic Guardian and the Dark Magician created a compassionate relationship with each other. Dark Magician Girl made new friends with Zelda, Peach, and Daisy. Link and the Flaming Swordsman got into a fight. Tea manged to hook up with her old boy toy Roy causing the tri-color hair Yugi lonely being once more as Captain Falcon flirted with the Harpie Ladies.  
  
Pikachu went searching for JigglyPuff, but got eletricuted by Summon Skull who mistaken him for a rat.  
  
Well, there was food, music, hot babes, bishonen...   
  
Perhaps Pegasus will finally managed to be popular...for once!!!  
  
And everyone was happy, well sorta.  
  
"I am going to kill that Blue Eyes if it's the last thing I do!!" Seto yelled as he was being chased down by a hoard of wild untamed females who were after him and Yami Bakura.  
  
"Just shut up and run!!" Yami Bakura hissed, "They're FAN-GIRLS!!!"  
  
So the two boys were chased down by the vicious heard of fangirls as they ran off into the sunset.   
  
Chi Chi grinned happily. He then taken a sip of his pina colata once more as he snickered. Finally, Kaiba-boy got what he deserved.  
  
And the world was safe from vile Pokemon creatures once more, especially that Mr. Jiggles.  
  
  
THE END 


End file.
